Moments

    i miss you. i miss the moments we've had. do i miss you or only the moments with you? no i miss the both of it. i once tried to act like i don't really care as much as i do now, but i can't because deep inside i do care. but i realized something these few days. i felt terrible about me.

    idk why. kenapa gue sometimes ngerasa awkward sama orang yang gue sayang. bahkan ngerasa aneh diperlakuin baik(sama beberapa orang). Perasaan ini tuh aneh, and in the end, hal-hal itu bikin gue jadi serba salah tiap mau ngomong tentang anything, sampe ngelakuin sesuatu aja gue serba salah. apa gue terlalu ngebiarin hal-hal buruk lewat gitu aja yang terjadi sama gue?

    is it better to be alone? i mean, without have no one to hurt us. gue sering lebih pengen sendiri. tapi, gue mikir.. kale gue sendiri, mungkin gue gaakan dapet hal-hal kayak gini buat gue pelajarin. beberapa orang mungkin tau gimana bikin gue ketawa. tapi gabanyak yang tau gimana bikin gue bahagia.

    banyak pelajaran yang udah gue dapet along my life is going. but, only a few things that i can apply to my days. setiap hari, gue selalu gagal di malam harinya. the morning - evening are fine with me. but in the night, it's the worst day-part. because when the night comes up, i think of every bad moments that  i expected it would be good. i have the negative thoughts from my mind. and sometimes, i feel worry about the things i have now. not only at the love things, but everything. i'm scared. scared about everyone will leave me one day. not because of their death, but they'll just leave me. so i'm trying my best to keep everything i have now.👍

Beautiful - Maroon 5

And I remember your eyes were so bright
When I first met you, so in love that night
And now I’m kissing your tears goodnight
And I can’t take it, you’re even perfect when you cry
Beautiful goodbye, bye, bye
Is dripping from your eyes, your beautiful goodbye
Is dripping from your eyes, oh yeah

When did the rain become a storm?
When did the clouds begin to form?
Yeah we got knocked out off course by a natural force
And well, we’ll be swimming when it’s gone

And I remember your eyes were so bright
When I first met you, so in love that night
And now I’m kissing your tears goodnight
And I can’t take it, you’re even perfect when you cry

Beautiful goodbye, bye, bye
Is dripping from your eyes, your beautiful goodbye
Is dripping from your eyes, oh yeah

All the pain you try to hide
Shows through your mascara lines as they stream down 
from your eyes
And let them go, let them fly
Holding back, won’t turn back time
Believe me, I’ve tried

Your eyes were so bright
And I remember your eyes were so bright
And I remember your eyes were so bright
When I first met you, how in love were we that night
And now I’m kissing your tears goodnight
And I can’t take it, you’re even perfect when you cry
Beautiful goodbye, bye, bye
Is dripping from your eyes, your beautiful goodbye
Is dripping from your eyes, yeah

Beau…..oh yeah

my top 10 fav movie

1. Dear John

2. LOL

3. A Walk to Remember

4. The Vow

5. Letters to Juliet

6. Friends with Benefits

7. P.S. I Love You

8. The Notebook

9. Transformers 3

10. Flipped

happy 11

today's september 11th. we finally reached our 20 month

happy 11 for the 20 ris

thank you for:
- making me feel loved
- making me feel right
- making me feel wrong and leaving a lot to learn
- telling sweet things that every girl would love to hear
- calling me your wife ahahaha:$
- all the sweet times you've let me in
- all the pains you've helped me to bear
- all the times we've spent together
- cheering me up to relieve my pain
- giving a lot to memorize:'3
- making me strong enough to walk through something

thank you so muuuuchh. it's all really worth it. the fighting, the waiting, and the price i pay is worth the memories.

but then, i'm sorry for:
- the mess i made that let you down
- the time i turned my back on you
- words i haven't said to you
- things i've done to you
- things i haven't done to you
- all the wrongs i've made
- the song i haven't sung to you yet :b
- being imperfect in every situation
- making some situations harder for you
- the pain i've made
- the things i shouldn't say to you
- making you feel bad when i should've been your mood maker
- sorry for not being the best
- sorry for making you feel bored
- sorry for saying something too much
- and i'm sorry for doing things i shouldn't do

yaa awet2 deh kita pokoknya ris hehe. love u

imysm

hey ris, are you doing great? kangen tau sm lo haha padahal baru beberapa jam ya kita ga bbm. i hope you're okay and having fun. i didn't mind to lose you for a while, it doesn't matter if you need some space. tp asli gue kgn bgt, suntuk gaada lo. lo lg main apa aja nih riis sm temen2? huuu it's not that fun spending my time without you:(

gue kangen lo. kepikiran... umm:s inget gue yaa

it hurts like hell

gmn sih rasanya berantem yg bener2 berantem?
how does it feel when you used to chat with him as much that you can't count, and now you don't?
how does it feel, when you feel like you're near to losing the one that you love?

what if they will leave you sooner than tomorrow, do you still believe in love?

what if you see someone you love most hanging with another person? can you still hold on?

what if you're nothing to fight for? will you still try to survive?

what if i won't let you go?:( will you still hold me back and keep whispering the same thing?
-yea!!! i hope you'll call me now and tell me that thing.

what if i can't take it anymore, what'd you do to make me strong?

then what if we're going wrong, will you say "i promise.....oh please, don't say like that...."?

what would you do if i feel i'm really annoying and have to take another way to go?

will you cry for me?

what if i run away from you, will you keep running to catch me? will you regret? or will you just cross another life without me?

what if i'm gone? will you remember me? could you still feel how much i've loved you? or will you try to bring me back?

will you still see me right next to you even when you're blinded with new comers?

what if you just don't love me like what you've always said? will you lie? or will you just let me know how pain hurts? or will you swear like "i swear i've just realized that i really love you..i'm not lying baby. oh sweet, please stay here with me"?